Sunday, June 21, 2009

Dude where's my moustache?

Masu is characterized by his thick, bushy moustache. He takes great pride in grooming his facial and other (according to anonymous sources) hair.
He is also known as IPv2, ie, I Am Probably Veerappan2.

From: Madhu
Date: Sat, 5 Jun 2004 21:18:00 +0530 (IST)
To: ug2
Subject: My Moustache II

sry to bother u again

If neone has lifted it deliberately
lemme tell u >......I hav taken much strain grooming it
daily....so plz...

--

hi from madhu

Thursday, May 21, 2009

not so 'vivek'

From what I remember this mail was a collaborative effort including me. If someone cannot get who [1-6] refer to, please leave a comment and we will enlighten you :P
----------

From: "vivek" vivek_kt@
Date: Mon, August 29, 2005 11:14 pm
To: ug4@
Subject: This is not vivek.. so plz read
Hi all,
I am not vivek otherwise known as kt or katarya or $#@%%$#.
It has been a long time since mail addressing ug4 has been sent. Hence i
got frustrated more than M$ogi[1] and decided to send one myself.
We r in 4th year and are still involved with acads !! We suck. Ppl take
some time off ur midsems/billi or even gre and do something interesting.
Whatever happened to the verbosity's[2] batch trip ?? Is it another dead
plan like his many others (e.g constitution)???

Finally, these r midsems and i dont even hav an exam to study for!!
I want run away frm here ... who ever wants to accompany may contact the
Thread [3] (Only place taken, once more left). For everything else theres
Chaos[4].

News flash: Mtv[5] is not askin any more questions .. jus fifa.

Conclusion: V r all very very bored.

References
[1] - Ocean Frustrated
[2] - Sage 'Brother of Agastya'
[3] - For details mail to prashant_j@students.
[4] - There was Chaos, then came earth, then came love.
[5] - Akhir KYUN??

ps - time to write a research paper, Chituri[6] plz help.

[6] - search for chituri on acm/ieee/dblp or even google and click
i-m-feeling-lucky.

--
Competition starts for the silliest signature -
my entry: 'thumb-print' .
Can anyone beat this??

Monday, April 20, 2009

d0d0 gets pwned

d0d0, open login mailer extraordinaire, left its login open. Here is the result.

From: Ramachandra <ramachandra@
Date: Fri, 5 Nov 2004 20:30:47 +0530 (IST)
To: ug3@
Subject: now its my turn!!

now tht my exams r over i am free to bcome extinct..whew!!(in case ur
wondering why...duh...i am a d0d0 and so r u!!)

all of u shd take english literature as ur HSSM
esp. if u can write wonderful stories like me
in fact my stories r so gud tht i felt like showing zulu a sample
and did so in my popl paper ;)

all of u plz read my story..comments r always welcome :D

rama alias d0d0

PS:no need to thank me for spamming ur mail boxes

I hearby solemnly swear that I will not send any more open login mails and
that I have learnt my lesson. Thank you..whoever you are who sent this
mail!!

--

Ingenuity is the father of invention

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Baba OS

This mail from our UG1 days is not exactly a 'open-login' but fun nevertheless.
'Baba' here refers to Vishwanath Rawat of UG2k2


Date: Fri, 28 Feb 2003 02:51:09 -0800 (PST)
From: Videshi Baba
To: ug1@students.iiit.net
Subject: BABA'S O.S.

hello ,
As ordered by baba (videshi) we are going to start working on the
world's biggest project in the field of computer science. YES u r right it is
"videshi baba's Operating System".

BABA's HISTORY :
Born in 1982 in M.P. (Gwalior).Baba was not like a normal child since
childhood.He had many dreams, and the courage and determination to fulfill them. But
his actual career started on 26'th JULY 2002 when he saw a computer for the first
time,and then he realised that this was the tool to fulfill his aim.It didn't take
much time for him to become a superuser of a computer. His hardwork fascinated many
of his colleagues. but he didn't like the slow netspeed and the functioning of
computers which made him to think of building an O.S. which can fulfil the needs
& demands of present generation.

Then he started his project on 6th JAN 2003 exploring the internet for days and
nights.(even on holidays esp. sunday mornings). and built the company on 14th feb
2003

DESCRIPTION OF BABA'S COMPANY

TODAY at present there are more than 20 people working under baba's "sharan". But
this is just the begining,experts predict that its going to make microsoft bankrupt
and there wont be any unemployment in the world by 2005 as Baba's company with an
employee strength of 10 million will take care of everyone in the world. At present
BABA'S COMPANY is 5th in the O.S. marketing business. but it is expected that within
a year BABA's o.s. will be the leading O.S.

Here are some statistics :
O.S. users turnover ( in year 2002-2003 )
windows 85.2% $ 120,000,000
linux 8.3% $ 0 (free)
unix 3.5% $ 1,000,000
macintosh 2.995% $ 800,000
videshi baba 0.005% $ 0 (free)

For the statistics as predicted by experts see NEXT PAGE

OFFICIALS WORKING UNDER BABA

name post salary (monthly in Rs)
SURYAKANT ------> PUBLIC RELATION OFFICER 2,00,000
SHIBEN ------> GRAPHICS ENGINEER 2,50,000
GAUTAM ------> TEXT MODE ENGINEER 2,00,000
ARPIT ------> EDITOR OF NEWSLETTER 1,50,000
ABHAY ------> P.A. OF BABA 3,50,000
SUMEET ------> MANAGER 3,00,000
NIKHIL ------> FOREIGN RELATION OFFICER 2,50,000
VIVEK ------> RECRUITMENT OFFICER 2,00,000
SAYAN ------> C.E.O. 3,50,000
XYZ ------> BODYGAURD OF BABA 1,00,000


Statistics as predicted by experts after 3.5 years

O.S. users (in turnover ( in year 2002-2003 )
windows 1.02 $ 10,000
linux .05 $ 0 (free)
unix .03 $ 100
macintosh .005 $ 35
videshi baba 98.895 $ 0 (free)



WANNA GET A JOB ?????

then reply at the i.d. "baba_videshi@yahoo.com"



suggestions for the improvement of newsletter are welcome.

u can also subscribe for the BABA'S newsletter WHICH IS FREE OF COST
IF YOU WANT TO SUBSCRIBE THEN REPLY AT "baba_videshi@yahoo.com"

wait for the next mail
( only for the persons who has subscribed and the recruited officials).


-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

BABA KA SAPNA ------- SABKA APNA

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Monday, March 2, 2009

in support of Madhusudhanan

Those who are acquainted with Madhusudhanan of UG2k2 will appreciate this mail quite well ;). The 'anonymous' senders of this mail are Manikandan and yours truly, as evident from the pseudonym 'ChaoticDodo', where Chaos and Dodo were the chosen and acquired mail nicknames of the two respectively.

====

Date: Fri, 31 Mar 2006 18:06:01 +0530 (IST)
From: Kranthi Chowdary
To: ug4@
Subject: plea for a national treasure!!

Hi all,

We have just heard from Masu that he is gonna shave his famed moustache
before farewell ... we all agree that it will be a great loss to us.

Let us all make a plea to the SLC in order to save this national artifact.
please write ur name at the end of this mail and forward it to as many
people as u can ... thanks to the sysadmins, we can track how many times
the mail has been forwarded, each forward shall save one hair of his
moustache.

Thankyou

Signatures
----------

ChaoticDodo
Kranthi

===

Friday, February 6, 2009

CSE or ECE?

This one is from 2nd sem. Does anyone know who sent this?

Date: Sun, 27 Apr 2003 20:05:03 +0530 (IST)
From: Pooja Verlani
To: ug1
Subject: Imp

I am totally depressed with the EC test, I had so many hopes on
Electronics, and santosh was the one who instigated all of us into getting
into ECE.. now it is more like all of us who took to ECE look like they
are going to fail in the most basic course of ECE, so i will like to
take back my name (and also aditi's) (as abt santosh watchout, he's gonna
face my music)
so will rammurthy and all his followers, beware my wrath..
i expect to get lots of support in this regard..., lets protest and shout
as loud as we can and see who shouts better, our sir or us
those interested reply back to this mail immediately.

divided we fall, united we shout

--
*****************************************************************************
"When the going gets tough, the tough take a coffee break."
-Pooja (black belt,karate)
****************************************************************************

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Matrix revisited

a couple of weeks after sending the mail in the previous post, I found Gopalakrishna's login open and tried to write a sequel. Ofcourse it was just as bad as the Matrix sequels :D

---------- Forwarded message ----------
Date: Wed, 11 Feb 2004 01:46:23 +0530 (IST)
From: A.Gopalakrishna. gopalakrishna@
To: ug2@
Subject: Imp () continuation...


Just then i woke up!

I looked at the boy standing in the middle of the Library. He looked like he was sleeping.Yet he was standing! I wentnear him.I noticed that his feet were slightly above the ground! I looked around n found another girl in the library. She was busy reading something. i tried to wake this boy. He was bony but strong. I tried to move him around but he woudnt budge.

Just then i noticed a faint glow coming out of roof. The light grew stronger. Its colour changed to orange from yellow. The boy suddenly opened his eyes! He looked around ,then pointed at me n said, " Hey where is Trinity?" I couldnt understand what he was talking abt.
Just then the girl looked up n said " dont u listen to him. He is sleep-walking n talking, basically living a dream." I thought she was right. So once again i tried to shake him.But he caught
my hand ,looked me straight in the face n said,"Better tell me the truth or else u will have to pay " Then his under hand reached for my throat n held it in a vice like grip. I couldnt breathe. i noticed that his nails were growing larger...

I looked at the girl pleading for her to save me. But, She gave a wicked smile n said " Why did u disturb him,Now suffer the consewuances." I tried to call for help but could not find my voice. Just then there was a bright glow everywhere. The heavenly light blinded my eyes. At the same
time i felt the grip loosening n freed myself. I closed my eyes for a second n when i opened them again, everything was dark.

Then i heard a booming voice " Welcome, You are one of the few unfortunate persons to come to this place" U can curse ur luck Now that u r in the Matrix,let me clear up a few things for u. There is only one way out of here. This Matrix is not virtual. It is as real as anything else.

I asked " So why m i here?" The voice shouted" No questions, just listen"
He continued n went on n on n on n on on....

Finally i culdnt take it anymore n said" plz stop, spare me" Then i heard a female voice which said " No dont stop,This person interupted the divine thoughts of our Neo,He shud be punished"

I said " i was only trying to help,plz forgive me"
The voice said " I will let Sherlock, take over"

Then the lights came on n i found myself standing there on a big ground n i could find no one anywhere near me.

Just then i felt my pants being tugged n lokked down to find a Lilliput ther. Ther were 2 other similar species with him. The same voice continued(Though now i knew its origin) " Since u r so big, u may be useful to us, For that u need to join us"

But now i was gaining in confidence (looking at their size) n said" What if i dont join u ?",The voice said " U have no choice"

With that he flew up so that he at the same level as that of my face n then with a wink of his flew into my mouth n i swallowed him!

I tried to spit him out,throw up,cough him out, did various movements n bent many ways but couldnt not discard him from my system. Just then i coughed again n opened my eyes to see everyone around the table looking at me.

Now where was I?

Not in the matrix but in the mess. But then whats the difference. Both are not in our control??

Bad story i agree, but again something is better than nothing :)

CM Inc


Gopala (Go pale with fear)
CEO
Creative Mails Inc

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Sherlock meets Harry Potter against the Matrix!

Ok folks, here's the next one. Our extinct friend, d0d0 aka mythalez, had some fun with Natraj's login:

Date: Sat, 24 Jan 2004 15:25:18 +0530 (IST)
From: Nataraj J-R.No.200201037
To: ug2
Subject: Imp ()read quickly


Hi everybody!

I wrote todays exam quite well umlike the rest of u. As a
relaxation i went to the library n started reading Sherlock Holmes. Soon
the library started emptying n finally i was alone with the guard n
another girl(guess who?). Soon i was lost in the novel,mayb i fell
asleep.But suddenly i woke up with a start n saw this man standing befor
me. He looked uncannily similar to Sherlock. Was i dreaming ? Soon the
girl started shouting.This man looked at me n motioned me to remain quiet.
But the guard outside didnt seem to listen to the shouts of the girl.
This Sherlock went near her n she fell silent. He motioned both of us to
one side of the hall.I obeyed since i was frightened n thought he had a
gun. We both were standing there quietly,That man removed his cell from
the pocket n made a call.The girl clung on to me n was shivering with
fright. The guard seemed to be asleep.

Suddenly the doors of the Lib opened n in walked Harry.(U know , that Wizard).
He took out his wand n pointing it towards Sherlock said something in an alien
tongue.
Sherlock shouted at him ,But i thought his face looked perturbed. Harry said
" wingardian leviosa" n the man flew up the ceiling n was stuck to it.

Then Harry turned to me n said "So Voldermot now how can u escape ?"
I was bewildered.The girl said to Harry "No he cannot be You-know-Who,he
saved me!".

Harry said"He was trying to trick u Hermione, Now move aside".

I said " i am Natraj -THE ONE".

Harry said "Ofcourse u r one ,not two".
I said " I mean i m NEO . n this is Trinity".
Sherlock(near the ceiling) said "I m Morpheus,save me Neo".

Harry pointed at me n said "cruciatus" but i put out my palm n the spell
rebounded n hit Harry himself. Harry was writhing in pain. The girl
shouted at me for harming Harry.

I got angry n sent her into the MATRIX with the help of Sherlock's
cell-phone.

Finally the guard woke up.

Just then ........................

For the continuation keep checking ur mail...

I m telling u abt all this since my friends forced me to.
They didnt want the rest of our classmates miss out on such a wonderfull
true-life story.

CM inc

Creative Mails Inc.

Natraj
Managing Director(The only ONE).

Saturday, January 17, 2009

Strange animal on IIIT's premises

Date: Mon, 1 Mar 2004 21:54:43 +0530 (IST)
From: Visram R -R.No.200201080
To: ug2
Subject: The Origin of Species

Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawn,
It may interest you to know that a new animal, previously unknown to man, has been captured in the Gachibowli area of Hyderabad. This unique creature rather resembles a squirrel, but scientists argue that it must be an ape as it walks on two legs and carries what resembles a tiny
schoolbag. Scientists are unable to explain this most interesting phenomenon as biological tests have conclusively proved that this new creature (named Visu *zzzzz* Ram latin name: Toongumoonjikus Kottavius) does not attend classes. From the information available, we have inferred that this creature had just woken up from an extended period of hibernation when it was captured by a security guard outside IIIT, Hyderabad.

Our scientists had to periodically pour water on the animal to keep it awake during the examination. After a few buckets were emptied on it, the cute little mammal seemed to become aware of its surrounding (finally!). It started a loud chattering that sounded rather like, "Assignment panniya". The animal will be taken to Vandalur Zoo, Chennai tomorrow. For the time it is being kept in a vacant room (no. 109, NBH) in the IIIT premises. I encourage you all to visit this adorable little creature before it is taken away from us. You never know, we may never see it awake again....

Luv n sweet dreams,
Sl33PW4lk3ER

PS: Any fan mail/letters for our little celebrity may be addressed to
_Hermione_RuLZ_@fanfiction.net

--
sleepwalking is the $PATH to /usr/local/enlightenment

Let's start this long overdue event

Rmstar and I were supposed to have done this a long time ago - more than 2 years ago, to be precise. But we being, what we are, typical IIIT products, lazy and inertia-prone did not do it till now. As a consequence, we lost out on a lot of good material. The material is the open-login mails that have been sent to ug2k2 during its four year stay at IIIT-hyderabad.

Anyway, being the bombastic authors of this blog, we start with a mail that was sent by Prashant aka Rmstar aka Thread aka paccha. I think it is a fine example of what an open-login mail should be = extremely hilarious and poking great fun at the attributes of the poor victim, who in this case is Visram, well-known for not being seen outside his room for weeks on end.